It's been awhile since I've gone a little off track  on a random rambling, but hopefully you're up for it today. If not, scoot on past to the next penny-pinched post! 😉 And in case you're wondering – those are my two of my three kiddos with their sweet cousins ~ aren't they cute?
God gave me three very unique children. For the sake of their anonymity, I won't share too many specifics, but I will tell you that they are all different.
And not a single one of them has fallen into the mold I expected when becoming a mom.
{I thought it would be easy?}
But I've seen something so interesting as we're raising these kids. The one that I thought would navigate life so easily struggles with things that seem so insignificant at times.
The one that I thought might never conquer a spelling test somehow has learned to manage my entire home. (Seriously guys, it's crazy what that kid can do.)
And the one who picked up the stack of “easy cards” at birth (it's all easy for this one – kind of annoying to watch them really), is undoubtedly the one I have to parent the most heavily every day. (Wasn't God supposed to give me an easy one?)
So why (on earth), am I sharing these really random ramblings with you? I was there too.
I was at that point where I didn't know how on earth to parent a child who was so very different from me. I prayed endless nights hoping to somehow do something right ~ that constant discipline, never-ending practice on the hard things, and encouragement in the right direction might change something.
And somewhere along the way things clicked along and we ended up here.
In this place where parenting isn't really easier, but I've realized they're going to be fine ~ and I so wished another mom had told me that those crazy quirks my children had when they were younger really would change as they grow.
All of our children are unique.
You may hear a friend (repeatedly) brag that their child is a rockstar . . . brilliant, beautiful, and really just perfect (and I'm betting that kid may even look like from the outside too.)
But you know what? That child has something they struggle along with just like your child does, and no matter what the parent may say with their words, they've seen some struggles too.
So instead of worrying . . .Â
Celebrate your child's uniqueness. Love them extra today ~ just the way they are. Praise what they're fantastic at ~ try praying with them and over them in their struggles (and your own struggles too.)
If they can't spell ~ one day they'll learn to type and spell check really will help. 🙂
If they can't tie their shoes ~ introduce them to velcro. (I promise, they all learn to tie their shoes. Really.)
And goodness gracious ~ if they've managed to miss the mark on the toilet for the nine thousandth time, show them where the Lysol Wipes are, and just let it go.
(Their wife will thank you one day!) 😉
Okay?Â
Your child ~ whether absolutely perfect or a tiny bit flawed like mine ~ is perfect. He or she has the most amazing God-given talents that you can't even see yet. And if you're a parent, you and I are tasked with the coolest gift of raising them each day.
Be encouraged that no matter where you are in your parenting, you have a precious gift that really is going to be all right. (This is coming from a momma who hauled one child out of Zaxby's kicking and screaming because they didn't get to pick their meal just this weekend ~ y'all, I have seen some tantrums around here, and I'm not saying it's going to be easy.) But, you will get through this, and so will your child.  Love on them all you can, pray without ceasing, and know that He's got an awesome plan in store for them. Just wait and see. 😉
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to hard you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Ruby says
I have 4 boys… they are SO different from each other! But the one most different from me is the one that TODAY (of all days for me to read this post) is really struggling with bad choices. And I am struggling with my response. So thank you for the reminder to appreciate him just as he is, even (maybe especially) today. And to keep praying over him without ceasing!
Laurie says
Yes Ruby – they really are all so different, and I think we all have one that sometimes pushes us harder (and honestly, I swear my kids take turns being “the one”!) Praying for you and that one this morning in your home and in mine – God has such good plans for them!
Mary Kelley says
This was beautifully written, thank you! As a mom to 15 (6 blessings through birth and 9 blessings through adoption) I agree 100%. Life is never dull … but you can get through it all with a sense of humor and lots of prayers! In the end we all do the best we can. =)
Laurie says
WOW Mary – you must have just the most amazing perspective! Thank you so much for your kind encouragement to all of us moms 🙂
Charity Poskonka says
Perfect! Thank you! needed to hear this today. had 3 little girls in 3 years, and the oldest is nearly five now…. it's been a wild ride and I need a perspective shift like this to remind me of the important things in life. thank you.
Laurie says
Hang in there Charity – you’re right in the thick of it! It really does get so much easier but it is BUSY in those years. Blessings to you and your sweet girls!
Kathy Collins Lovins says
Wow that is so true. Amen
Theresa Berry says
Amen!
Laurie Deal Wilson says
Wow! This was just PERFECT!! And if I can add one more thing, this still applies when they are college age and up as well. You just reminded me to keep things in perspective. Thank you. <3
Laurie says
Thank you Laurie for that reminder – my oldest is entering high school this fall (eek!), and we were just talking with him about colleges, decisions, etc. It completely worried him, and us too 🙂 Wonderful reminder that life is constantly a learning process, and who we are today just isn’t who we’re going to be, so why would expect that of our kids? Thanks for reminding me of that this morning!
Janet Herrel Sherwood says
Thanks…confirms what I've been feeling recently perfectly!!!
Laurie says
So glad it helps Janet – blessings to you right where you’re at!
Michele says
Thank you so much for this post! I so needed this! When I read this part… “and I so wished another mom had told me that those crazy quirks my children had when they were younger really would change as they grow.”…I just felt relief. I tend to be a worrier, especially when it comes to my child and I worry too much about what other people think (I’m working on this 🙂
I have also been reading The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Omartian which is helping. I try to remind myself that God loves and wants the best for my child even more than I do. Thanks again for sharing this!!
Laurie says
I love the book the Power of a Praying Parent also Michele, and need to pull it back out! I think we all so easily forget how quirky we were ourselves as kids, and somehow we all survived. 🙂 As a worrier too, I just want moms to remember our kids really will turn out just fine!
Laura Pell Schuppener says
I needed this tonight!!! They are so unique and even 'foreign' to me sometimes!!! And just when I think I might have it figured out, they change it all up on me. Sorta like when they were babies and you just figure out how many ounces they will take and then they go and grow. I love the 'y'all, I have seen some tantrums around here'.
I always worry if I've gone overboard or what I'm doing wrong, but I guess the fact that they are still speaking to me and give me hugs or hang on me and even occasionally apologize out of the blue, I'm doin' ok.
Laurie says
Laura – goodness you are such a good mom and your kids are precious! 🙂 What I would give for a manual that just told us exactly what to give them to know that they would grow up just fine. This parenting business is not for the weak of heart! 🙂
Alice says
As always, I love reading your random ramblings. It always hits so close to home!
Laurie says
Probably because we’re right in the same place Alice- goodness it’s hard to be a mom (I love it, but know every day that I’ve got so much to learn!)
Gina says
Woo Hoo! That’s called a word in due season. I’d like to add that I went on a retreat with a distant relative once & she appeared to have it all. She was married a very long time & she went on & on about how much she loved her husband & was ready to start a family, etc. Well I was slightly jealous but mostly inspired because they were married at least 5 years longer than I was (I was married 15 years at the time). So I started praying for a stronger marriage, love, connection, etc and 4 months after the retreat I learned they were divorced and both in new relationships. Don’t believe everything you see or even hear. The grass is not always greener. Stay prayerful & thankful & God will bless you & yours! This Sunday we celebrate 18 years of marriage with all it’s turbulence till death do us part.
Laurie says
How wonderful Gina for you and your husband! So many people definitely make things look better than they sometimes really are, so it’s good to remember that we never see the real picture. (Marriage and families are just HARD!) Thanks so much for your words of encouragement – I think we all have moments of jealous but need to remember that somethings just aren’t easy. Blessings!
Laurie says
I think we all feel that way all too often Jennifer – being a mom is just so hard and I don’t know that any of us feel like we’ve got it right! I do think they survive even our failures, and goodness they teach us so much 🙂
Carol Parker says
def
Jennifer says
Thank you for the encouragement! I really need it 🙂 Sometimes I feel like a “failure mom” …. but this is just the perfect pick-me-up!
Robin says
Thank you for this today. I think that I often think that my parenting struggles are unlike anyone else’s. Mother’s are so hard on themselves and sometimes forget to encourage one another for fear of looking less than perfect. I am so far from a perfect mother, and thank you for reminding me that my precious unique little ones aren’t going to be perfect either!
Laurie says
I struggle so much with the same thing Robin -I always think mine are the only ones who do (whatever) “uniquely”, and I get frustrated before remembering that all kids have their quirks. 😉 It’s so difficult especially if one struggles a little more than others, but I really think they get special gifts the other ones miss!
Kristi says
Thank you! I needed to hear this!
Laurie says
You’re so welcome Kristi – I so need to remember it too! 🙂
Denise says
Thanks for this post. I also am the mom of 3 and yes they are all different. I too have been through and am going through these struggles of worrying about one in particular. Next week it could be a different child. It is hard to let go and trust that all will be okay in life (As a mom, I think I should be able to “fix” them/their problems). I fully agree with prayer and I really needed this reminder.
Laurie says
Thanks so much for letting me know I’m not the only one who feels that way Denise! It’s so hard some days, especially when you have one you really worry over (I do the same thing.) I have had so much peace over the last year about that one ~ and I really do think God has such a special plan for all of them … if we can just be patient enough to wait and see! 🙂